the sound of music.

100 things July 20, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 1:14 am

copied this of someones blog randomly.
i wanted to post something not so serious and this is just perfect.
read on!

1. Real Name: I’d tell you but I will have to kill you first.

2. Like it? I think it’s nice

4. Zodiac Sign: Sagittarius

5. Male or Female: Male

6. Elementary: Problem child

7. Middle: Crazy fun!

8. High: Hookups every night, chicks, party, hangovers, friends

9. College: Hungover for 3 and a half years, don’t recall much

10. Hair Color: Brown

11. Eye Color: Light brown

12. Hair Length: Short

13. Current Worry: How will I make breakfast? I’m out of all naashta grocery.

14. Race: Huh?

15. Are you a health freak? Not at all

16. Height: 6’0

17. Do you have a crush on someone? Yeah

18. Do you like yourself? I’ve lived with me for 30+ plus years, I think I like myself

19. Piercings: Nah

20. Tattoos: Nopes

21. Righty or lefty: Lefty


22. First surgery: 2004

23. First piercing: Never happened

24. First friend: Eric

25. First award: For participation in a school play

26. First sport: Swimming

27. First pet: A turtle

28. First vacation: The first one I remember was to Pakistan

29. First teacher: Haven’t a clue

30. First crush: My mothers best friend


31. Orange or Apple juice: Apple

32. Rock or Rap: Rock

33. Country or screamo: Neither

34. Nsync or Backsteet Boys: N Sync

35. Britney Spears or Christina Aguilera: Britney

36. Night or Day: Night

37. Sun or Moon: Moon

38. Tv or Internet: It’s a choice so, Internet

39. Playstation or Xbox: Xbox

40. Kiss or Hug: Depends on the moment

41. Iguana or Turtle: Turtle

42. Spider or Bee: Bee!

43. Fall or Spring: Fall

44. Limewire or iTunes: Don’t care for either

46. Soccer or Baseball: Soccer


50. Drinking: No

51. I’m about to: Sleep

53. Singing: Day ‘n’ Night

54. Typing: Looks like it 😛


55. Want kids? Hell Yeah!

56. When? Starting maybe end of next year

57. Want to get married? Yeah

58. When? This year, inshallah

59. Where do you want to live? Definitely not in Pakistan

60. How many kids do you want? Hundreds of them

61. Any name on the mind? 4 confirmed

62. What did you want to be when you were little? A pilot I think

63. What did you think you’ll be doing? Didn’t think through things that much, still don’t

64. Mellow future or Wild: Are you serious?

66. Something you would never try? There is not a thing in the world I wouldn’t try

67. When do you want to die? Never


68. Lips or Eyes: Eyes

69. Hugging or kissing: Both, cannot choose

70. Shorter or taller: Shorter

71. Tan skinned or Light: Tanned

72. Romantic or spontaneous: I’m a romantic, she can be spontaneous

73. Dark or Light hair: Dark

74. Muscular or Normal: Dude? Normal.

75. Hook-up or Relationships: Why would you even bother asking a guy this question?

76. Similar to you or different: A little bit of both I guess, I don’t know


78. Kissed a stranger? Only strangers! hahaha

79. Drank bubbles? Yes!

80. Broken a bone? Yes, many bones, many times

81. Climbed up a tree? Yeah

82. Broken someone’s heart? Yeah

83. Turned someone down? Yeah

84. Had your heart broken? Yup

85. Liked a friend as more than a friend? Nah


86. Yourself? Not as much as I should

87. Miracles? Yes

88. Love at first sight? No

89. Santa Claus? Yeah

90. Kiss on first date: I don’t “believe” in it but it’s happened

91. Angels? Yes


92. Is there one or more people you want to be with right now? Just one

93. Who is it? I think the entire world knows

94. Like someone? Yeah


95. Text message: Don’t own a cell phone

96. Received call: Read 95

97. Call made: to M

98. Facebook message: Does Twitter count?

99. Missed call: Read 95 again

100. Last hungout with: A bunch of friends on saturday


a wonderful yesterday July 17, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 2:54 am

yesterday i realized more than ever how badly i want to be a dad.

i was asleep when at 4 am there was a knock on my apartment door and one my neighbors,
a single mother,
asked me if i could look after her 2 young kids,
3 and 5 years old (girl and boy respectively),
since she had to rush to the hospital to a friend.

i said of course and got their things and brought them inside.
they lay down and fell asleep almost immediately.
i didn’t even have to do anything really.

but after a while,
the little one woke up.
she was cranky and kept wanting to play.

she was lying on my tummy horizontally playing and after a while,
slept on my tummy like that.
i tried to put her on the mattress but she held on to my shirt so tight i let her be,
and so she slept on me for about 5 hours.

when her mum came and saw all 3 of us sleeping,
especially her daughter on top of me,
she started crying and told me that her kids hadn’t slept this peacefully in 7 months,
ever since their dad left.
when the mum tried to pick up her daughter,
she would start crying and didn’t want to moved.
i sent the mum to her apartment and told her I’ll drop the kids when they wake up.

when we woke up,
the daughter still refused to let go of me,
and kept hugging me so tight.

i told the mum i will take her with me,
it’s not a bother at all,
i have to run a few errands and i will bring her back in a while.

so i spent my entire day with a 3 year old,
and it was undoubtedly one of the best days of my life.

i love kids.
i’m good with them and we get along well.

i cannot wait to have my own little me and running around the house.
i want to have hundreds of them,
but i think it might get a little too much for my wife so plan B is to adopt the rest.


i am the only child.
i missed out on everything that brothers and sisters do.
maybe that’s the reason i want to have a houseful of kids.
i don’t know.
i don’t care.

i cannot wait to be a dad.


God as i see Him July 16, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 1:40 am
Tags: , , ,

i have felt and been through many emotions in my life.

i was more sensitive towards my surroundings,
and i always paid close attention to detail.
i had the ability to look beyond what is being said,
and being presented.
i felt more than i ever saw.

i was never really a believer.
but i was never really a disbeliever either.
i didn’t believe in my own capabilities.
i didn’t believe in myself.
i still don’t truly.

there comes a point in everyones life where they meet someone,
and that someone changes your life forever.
and they show you things that either you had never seen before,
or you saw them but didn’t notice them.

and then along came this person who was so confident,
a complete believer,
used words like faith and hope and belief.

for me,
this person opened up the world of God.

it didn’t happen at once.
it was a slow process,
took many years.
i’m still going through the process.

God is a process.

it’s an on going process.

during the process,
you fall.
you stumble.
you lose faith.
you hate.
you love.
you get angry.

it’s a painful,
on-going process.
believing is not an easy thing to do.

but what it does for you at times is,
it gives you a sense of peace.

The thing with God,
that I have learnt is that you have to ask Him.
He wants us to ask Him for what we want.
He likes it when we go to Him again and again.
He wants is to go to Him,
talk to Him.

He wants us to to do dua (prayer).
And I have seen with my own dua,
not a single dua ever goes to waste.

I am going to share a little secret of dua with everyone today.
You have to try it and tell me how it worked.

If someone you know,
or even yourself is having a headache,
all you have to do is close your eyes,
concentrate and say to God please make this pain go away,
within a few minutes,
it will become better.

it’s nothing else but a little faith that you put in Him that I am asking you for your help,
and He will help you.

every single day,
i do dua for so many people.
sometimes people request me to do their dua on the spot,
and they know how quickly it works.
i encourage everyone to do it themselves.

it’s a very small step towards the belief in God.
baby step.
but once you will see it work,
you will start believing.
because us humans,
we need to see something before believing in it completely.

do it and see for yourself.
but when you do it,
you have to do it with the faith that this will help.
it’s exactly the same theory as taking medicine.
when one takes a pain killer,
we believe that it will work.
it’s the trust.

try it.
don’t be afraid.


this post is the beginning of a series of posts that I will write,
in which I will share my experiences of God with you.

Until next time,
God Bless.


we had him July 12, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 1:55 am
Tags: , ,

i had the priviledge of attending Michael Jacksons memorial.
i am one of the few lucky ones who were inside the Staples Centre.
i was part of that group of people who were gathered there and we,
along with billions of people across the globe,
celebrated the life and music of the king.

what a great event.

the greatest memory of the memorial,
for me,
will forever remain when everyone stood up and sang we are the world and heal the world.
i promise you,
there was not a soul in that centre who didn’t have tears in their eyes.

what an extraordinary moment.

what a loss.

i had already bought tickets for his London concert.
the series of concerts were to start in 2 days from today.
i have the greatest of memories with MJ’s music.
i grew up listening to his album “off the wall” because dad had the album and he would play it all the time.

my dad attended one of his concert with his friends.
i remember he would say to me “if there is one artist you should see perform live, that’s Michael Jackson.”

and that is the reason i bought his concert ticket but it wasn’t meant to be i guess.
i will not be getting a refund on the ticket.
i have framed it and it’s on my wall.

sitting at the memorial,

listening to all the memories being shared of him by his friends and family,
i thought what a pity it is that we are paying tribute to this man after treating him like shit in his life.
it is sad that we realize the worth of someone the moment they leave us.

why can’t we honor,
pay tributes in their life time?

“He thrived with passion and compassion, humor and style. We had him whether we know who he was or did not know, he was ours and we were his.

We had him, beautiful, delighting our eyes.
His hat, aslant over his brow, and took a pose on his toes for all of us.
And we laughed and stomped our feet for him.
We were enchanted with his passion because he held nothing. He gave us all he had been given.
Today in Tokyo, beneath the Eiffel Tower, in Ghana’s Black Star Square.
In Johannesburg and Pittsburgh, in Birmingham, Alabama, and Birmingham, England
We are missing Michael.
But we do know we had him, and we are the world.”


A Summer Dream June 25, 2009

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 11:10 am
Tags: , , ,

i write today after a year and a half because…well.
i miss sharing my experiences and my stories.

i just have one question to ask you today.

ever get the feeling you’re meant to do something extraordinary?


the other side of this life. January 7, 2008

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 4:06 pm

..and would you wanna see
if seeing meant that you would have to believe…?

the past few months,
i’ve been shown things.
i’ve been told things.

i see the angels.
i talk to them.
i help them help people.
i am shown the world that exists parallel to ours.

i am supposed to be special.
i am not supposed to be one of you.

that explains the unusual events that took place in my life.

my loss,
my pain,
my accident,
my heartache,
my loving,
my being loved,
my having love,
my losing love,
my fighting,
my struggle,
my losing hope,
my gaining strength,
my believing in God,
my restoration of faith,
my rising above…

it was all that i had to go through,
to be the person that i am today.

i am told i am man of God.

my gifts.
my abilities.
they are not my reward.
they are my responsibility.

i lived in denial for a long time.
i didn’t admit the things i could do.
i denied that i was in denial.
and like Meredith said in one of the episodes of Grey’s Anatomy:

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the dam bursts, all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired, we are scared, denying it doesn’t change the truth. Sooner or later we have to put aside our denial and face the world. Head on, guns blazing. De Nile. It’s not just a river in Egypt, it’s a freakin’ ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?

i fought with my reality for the most part of my life.
but now,
i have embraced it.

i am special.
i am God’s son.
He calls me His beta.

He tells me He loves me.
He tells me He loves us all.
He tells me to look for the good in everyone.
He tells me to show everyone the good in themselves.

we struggle so much for reason.
for purpose.
for meaning.
and then,
in the end,
it is only to be found in one another.
in each other.


keep dreaming.
because the dream always come true.
it always shows its face.
the dream does become real.


pray to God.
ask Him for anything.
ask Him for everything.
thank Him.


know that there is always another way.
the future is not written in stone.

i don’t know how many will ever believe my story.
or the fact that i really do exist.

but some individuals,
it is true,
are more special.
they could be david blaine.
they could be bill gates.
they could be princess diana.
it is natural selection.
it begins as a single individual born like every other human.
seemingly ordinary.
except they’re not.

it’s destiny.


believing in a dream. September 5, 2007

Filed under: Uncategorized — in2deep @ 5:25 am

i wish i could be the only one feeling my own pain.
it hurts more when you know the other is hurting because of you..
for you..
with you.

i have come back from dying so many times.
i wonder why.
what do i have to do in this world.

what i want,
i don’t get.

why can i not just go away.

the world does not end.
the world will not end.

my world has crumbled into pieces.

the worst thing?

i still believe in the dream i had.
i believe in my dreams.

i have no reason to.
but i do.

i believe in the fairy tales.
in the princess who i will kiss and wake up.
in the love that we have.
in the truth of our fate.
in the moments that we lived.
in the words that i spoke.
in the dreams that we dreamt.
in the nights we filled with fireworks.
in the mornings we woke up to the eternal sunshine.
in the God who disappoints me.
in the strength of my blind faith.
in the happiness i am destined to get.
in the tears that fall from my eyes.

i believe.